
{"id":676,"date":"2018-08-14T11:14:07","date_gmt":"2018-08-14T16:14:07","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/?p=676"},"modified":"2023-09-22T11:02:02","modified_gmt":"2023-09-22T16:02:02","slug":"bonding-with-your-dog","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/bonding-with-your-dog\/","title":{"rendered":"Bonding With Your Dog!"},"content":{"rendered":"<h3><strong><span style=\"color: #ff6600\">I love my dog and my dog loves me!?!?<\/span><\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>Of course my dog loves me! They wag their tail when they see me, they come running to me, etc. \u201cLove\u201d is a big deal in the human-dog relationship but what about the &#8220;bond&#8221; between the dog and the pet parent. <strong>Love develops with time, <\/strong><strong>but a bond takes work. It requires attention, engagement and time to grow and mature<\/strong>.\u00a0<strong>Love is what makes your dog excited when you come home, while the bond is what keeps them with you when you need them to be<\/strong>. In human terms, you feel love for your relatives, but you share a bond with your best friend. A strong bond forms the key foundation of your entire relationship with your dog.<\/p>\n<p>When we look at human-dog relationships what we tend to see often, is a series of <strong>\u201chuman-created bond violations\u201d<\/strong> that have weakened the strength of the relationship between the dog and person. Some are major, such as physical punishment or not providing enough exercise, while others are more difficult to pinpoint\u2014a lack of confidence in the relationship or lack of engagement with the dog. For example, basic training certainly can improve these \u201csparkless\u201d relationships, but we often find weaker training outcomes where we have a weak bond.<\/p>\n<p>In order to have happy, frustration-free partnerships with our dogs, <strong>we need more than just love and training<\/strong>. For a relationship that truly thrives, we must <strong>cement a bond with our dog, built on trust, mutual respect and regard<\/strong>.<\/p>\n<h3><strong><span style=\"color: #ff6600\">Weak vs. Strong Bond Cues<\/span><\/strong><\/h3>\n<p>But of course, our bond with our dog is great! Why wouldn&#8217;t it be? Let&#8217;s look at a handful of ways we can view whether the bonding is truly as strong as we think it is.<\/p>\n<h4><strong><u>Signs that Your Bond is Weak<\/u><\/strong><\/h4>\n<p>Even though you may be a caring, considerate person,\u00a0your dog might still not feel a close bond with you. Signs\u00a0of a weak bond include:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Emotional indifference to you or others in the family. \u00a0A failure to respond to commands, especially the recall command<\/li>\n<li>Limited desire to play<\/li>\n<li>Not fond of being handled<\/li>\n<li>Regular attempts to run off<\/li>\n<li>Poor focus and eye contact<\/li>\n<li>Belligerence or even outright aggression toward you<\/li>\n<li>Depression or lethargic behavior<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<h4><strong><u>Signs of a Strong Bond<\/u><\/strong><\/h4>\n<p>There\u2019s no mistaking a dog who feels a real emotional\u00a0connection with you.\u00a0There\u2019s a real light in their eyes; they smile, wag, rub into you, and makes great eye contact. When you come home, they brighten up, becomes animated, and may even vocalize their joy. Other signs of a strong bond include:<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Keeping tabs on your location when they are off leash<\/li>\n<li>Frequently checking in to see where you\u2019re at<\/li>\n<li>Performing obedience happily without hesitation<\/li>\n<li>Making a great effort to find you when you play hide-and-seek<\/li>\n<li>A desire to be near you<\/li>\n<li>A high level of focus on you, evidenced by frequently looking at you<\/li>\n<li>Strong ability to communicate needs, wants, and concerns. (Do you understand what your dog wants in almost any given situation?)<\/li>\n<li>A willingness to protect or help you in a threatening situation. At the same time, time know that a dog can easily slide into guarding so protection by itself doesn\u2019t necessarily equal love.<\/li>\n<li>A love for physical interaction<\/li>\n<li>Once taught Come, the dog always responds, even when distracted (This one is tricky even for well-bonded dogs. If you\u2019ve got this down even in the most distracting of circumstances, congratulations!)<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p><img loading=\"lazy\" decoding=\"async\" data-attachment-id=\"662\" data-permalink=\"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/?attachment_id=662\" data-orig-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/s3-prod.dogtopia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/189\/2018\/08\/IMG_1689.jpg?fit=1536%2C2048&amp;ssl=1\" data-orig-size=\"1536,2048\" data-comments-opened=\"1\" data-image-meta=\"{&quot;aperture&quot;:&quot;2.4&quot;,&quot;credit&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;camera&quot;:&quot;iPad (6th generation)&quot;,&quot;caption&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;created_timestamp&quot;:&quot;1533140932&quot;,&quot;copyright&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;focal_length&quot;:&quot;3.3&quot;,&quot;iso&quot;:&quot;100&quot;,&quot;shutter_speed&quot;:&quot;0.033333333333333&quot;,&quot;title&quot;:&quot;&quot;,&quot;orientation&quot;:&quot;1&quot;}\" data-image-title=\"IMG_1689\" data-image-description=\"\" data-image-caption=\"\" data-medium-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/s3-prod.dogtopia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/189\/2018\/08\/IMG_1689.jpg?fit=225%2C300&amp;ssl=1\" data-large-file=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/s3-prod.dogtopia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/189\/2018\/08\/IMG_1689.jpg?fit=768%2C1024&amp;ssl=1\" class=\"alignright size-medium wp-image-662\" src=\"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/\/home\/dogtopia\/www\/releases\/65\/public\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/189\/2018\/08\/IMG_1689-225x300.jpg?resize=225%2C300&#038;ssl=1\" alt=\"\" width=\"225\" height=\"300\" data-recalc-dims=\"1\" \/><\/p>\n<h3><span style=\"color: #ff6600\"><strong>How to Improve Bonding With Your Dog\u00a0<\/strong><\/span><\/h3>\n<p>There are basic behaviors that people like to do that do not translate to dogs in a positive way. While dogs clearly do show and seek affection, their \u201clanguage\u201d tends to be non-verb<\/p>\n<p>al and humans tend to be more verbal. Additionally, our non-verbal behaviors tend to be more intrusive than what most dogs are comfortable with. <strong>While every dog is unique and may tolerate the behaviors below in they may not enjoy them<\/strong>. As you do things on the list below know that it can strain the bond that you\u2019re trying to form.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Commands with too many words<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>It\u2019s fine to have commands but when you get beyond 3 words it\u2019s far too tasking. They are trying to marry body language and verbal and humans aren\u2019t incredibly good at putting them both together. A great experiment is to try to spend a whole day not saying a word to your dog, but communicating only with your body. You\u2019ll realize just how much you \u201ctalk\u201d with your body without realizing it, how to use your movements and body position to get the response you need from your dog during training, and how involved a conversation can be without emitting a single sound.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Hugging your dog<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>While you might love wrapping your arms around a furry canine friend,\u00a0<a href=\"https:\/\/www.mnn.com\/family\/pets\/stories\/why-dogs-dont-like-to-be-hugged\">most dogs hate hugs<\/a>. Dogs don\u2019t have arms and they don\u2019t hug. If a dog places a foreleg or paw on the back of another dog, this is considered an act of control. No matter your intentions with hugging, a dog is likely to feel uncomfortable during the embrace.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Petting a dog&#8217;s face or patting her head<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Having someone reach out and tap us on the head, no matter how lovingly, is not something most of us enjoy. Ideally, it\u2019s best to come in under the chin so they know they can easily withdraw if they are uncomfortable. However, in most cases pet parents have to work a little harder to let their pups know that this \u201cuncomfortable\u201d touch equals love in the human world.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Kisses<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Dog\u2019s use their tongue lick as a <u>sign of submission<\/u>, not love. You should never demand a kiss from your dog since all you\u2019re doing is forcing dominance on your dog. Many dogs like to lick and kiss (especially when greeting other pack mates and grooming). Read the body language of your dog, do they wag and comply? Do they get nervous?, etc. The best strategy is to let them initiate vs. asking for kisses.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Picking them up like a baby<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Picking your dog up is fine but as soon as you turn them over and put them upside-down above the ground you\u2019re increasing their anxiety. Keep them paws down and you\u2019ll have a happier pup.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Prolonged eye contact<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>The more familiar you are with a dog the more you can maintain steady eye contact. Just like people, having a stranger stare at you turns creepy fast, the same is true from a dog\u2019s perspective.<\/p>\n<p>Approaching a dog in a way that is comfortable for both of you is to approach with your body angled slightly (not with your shoulders squared toward the dog), your eyes slightly averted, and speak quietly with a gentle voice. All these body language cues of friendship will help a dog understand you mean no harm. The dog might still want nothing to do with you, but at least you didn\u2019t approach him\/her in a scary way that could cause a defensive or aggressive reaction.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Not providing structure and rules<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Dogs want, need and love rules. You might think having strict rules makes life boring or unhappy for your dog. But dogs really want to know what\u2019s what according to their leader. Rules make life a lot more predictable, a lot less confusing and a lot less stressful. They also don\u2019t understand exceptions to rules. Dogs thrive when they know where the boundaries are, and when you spend time enforcing consistent boundaries with positive rewards, you also are building up their trust in you as a leader. You\u2019re setting up conditions for a very happy dog!<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Forcing your dog to interact with dogs or people he\/she clearly doesn\u2019t like<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Just like so many other social species, dogs have their favorite friends and their enemies. It is easy to see what other dogs \u2014 and people, for that matter \u2014 that a dog wants to hang out with and those with whom she\u2019d rather not associate. When dogs are pushed too far in social situations, they\u2019re more likely to lash out with a fight or a bite.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Going for walks without the opportunity to explore and smell (hasty walks)<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>There are walks, and there are walks. It\u2019s definitely important to have a dog that knows how to walk obediently on a leash. However, it\u2019s also important to allow a dog to have some time to explore their surroundings while walking obediently on a leash. Dogs see with their noses, and they place as much importance on their sense of smell as we humans place on our sense of vision for interpreting the world around us.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Keeping a tight leash (literally)<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Just as dogs are amazing at reading our body language, they\u2019re amazing at reading our tension levels even through the leash. By keeping a tight leash on a dog, you\u2019re raising the level of stress, frustration, and excitement for your dog, and conversely, for you.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Being boring<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Dogs abhor it when we&#8217;re boring. And it&#8217;s hard not to be! We get home from work and we want to unwind, to get a few chores done, to make dinner and sack out on the couch and relax. But that&#8217;s about the most annoying thing we could do to our dogs who have been waiting around all day for us to finally play with them. Consider using toys more as playtime or find a good doggie daycare as an outlet and change of pace.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Teasing<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>This should be obvious, but it&#8217;s worth pointing out because too many people still think it\u2019s funny. Don&#8217;t bark at a dog as you pass it on the street. Don&#8217;t wave or talk to a dog that is barking at you from behind a window or door. Don&#8217;t pull on a dog&#8217;s tail. The list can go on and on, but in short, don&#8217;t do something you know makes a dog mad just because you think it&#8217;s funny<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Dressing them up<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Yes, they look cute but when they have to wear apparel that they aren\u2019t comfortable with it doesn\u2019t help build the bond. You know if your dog loves a bandana, sweater, etc. However, you also know when they are wearing something for you and if they don\u2019t like it. Err on the dog&#8217;s side when choosing apparel.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Forcing them in scary situations<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>We sometimes have to bring our pets into unfamiliar circumstances but whenever possible try and not put them in scary situations. Nobody wants to go down that \u201cdark alley\u201d if it\u2019s not necessary. If you know you will be taking your pup into unknown territory, tale along some treats for positive reinforcement.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Strong Smells\/Fragrances<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>What you smell as one cinnamon roll they smell a million. The same goes for that splash of perfume, cologne, etc. Go light on the fragrances and your pet will thank you.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Too much alone time<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>No surprise but being alone, even loose in the house, isn\u2019t fun if there\u2019s nobody to play with. Carve out the time or find ways to have your pup play with other pups and people. Again, <a href=\"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/dog-daycare\/\">doggie daycare<\/a> is a great option to provide more entertainment for your pup.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Asserting dominance by leaning over a puppy<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Hovering over another dog is a way to demonstrate control, the same is true for humans. Side by side engagement is far better than the stand\/kneel and hover move.<\/p>\n<p>Sometimes you are in a hurry and you need them to go. Consistently hurrying them to go to the bathroom though doesn\u2019t allow them the time they would like to smell for the appropriate place to go as well as give them a few minutes to \u201cwarm up.\u201d If you\u2019re not in a hurry let them have the extra time.<\/p>\n<h5><strong>Remain calm<\/strong><\/h5>\n<p>Yelling, screaming and throwing a temper tantrum will frighten most dogs, even if that anger isn&#8217;t directed at them personally. And if it is, then it&#8217;s even more damaging. Do your best to always speak to your dog in a calm voice, even when they just ate your favorite shoes. Yelling doesn&#8217;t do anything to fix the problem, it only causes lasting damage to the relationship you have with your dog.<\/p>\n<h3>Next months post will give you some practical examples on bonding exercises that you can do with your dog to strengthen your bond.<\/h3>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I love my dog and my dog loves me!?!? Of course my dog loves me! They wag their tail when they see me, they come running to me, etc. \u201cLove\u201d is a big deal in the human-dog relationship but what about the &#8220;bond&#8221; between the dog and the pet parent. Love develops with time, but &hellip; <a href=\"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/bonding-with-your-dog\/>Continued<\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":346,"featured_media":1078,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[3],"tags":[],"fimg_url":"https:\/\/s3-prod.dogtopia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/189\/2018\/08\/IMG_5253.jpeg","yoast_head":"<!-- This site is optimized with the Yoast SEO Premium plugin v21.6 (Yoast SEO v22.3) - https:\/\/yoast.com\/wordpress\/plugins\/seo\/ -->\n<title>Bonding With Your Dog - Are You Straining the Relationship?<\/title>\n<meta name=\"description\" content=\"Of course your dog loves you! Wait, are you sure that you&#039;re not accidentally doing things that actually strain the bonding relationship? Look at these 19 items and see if you&#039;re possibly making it harder for your dog to be the happiest furry family member possible.\" \/>\n<meta name=\"robots\" content=\"index, follow, max-snippet:-1, max-image-preview:large, max-video-preview:-1\" \/>\n<link rel=\"canonical\" href=\"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/bonding-with-your-dog\/\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:locale\" content=\"en_US\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:type\" content=\"article\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:title\" content=\"Bonding With Your Dog!\" \/>\n<meta property=\"og:description\" content=\"Of course your dog loves you! Wait, are you sure that you&#039;re not accidentally doing things that actually strain the bonding relationship? 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Wait, are you sure that you're not accidentally doing things that actually strain the bonding relationship? Look at these 19 items and see if you're possibly making it harder for your dog to be the happiest furry family member possible.","robots":{"index":"index","follow":"follow","max-snippet":"max-snippet:-1","max-image-preview":"max-image-preview:large","max-video-preview":"max-video-preview:-1"},"canonical":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/bonding-with-your-dog\/","og_locale":"en_US","og_type":"article","og_title":"Bonding With Your Dog!","og_description":"Of course your dog loves you! Wait, are you sure that you're not accidentally doing things that actually strain the bonding relationship? Look at these 19 items and see if you're possibly making it harder for your dog to be the happiest furry family member possible.","og_url":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/bonding-with-your-dog\/","og_site_name":"Edmond","article_published_time":"2018-08-14T16:14:07+00:00","article_modified_time":"2023-09-22T16:02:02+00:00","og_image":[{"width":3024,"height":4032,"url":"https:\/\/s3-prod.dogtopia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/189\/2018\/08\/IMG_5253.jpeg","type":"image\/jpeg"}],"author":"mikeyoung2018","twitter_card":"summary_large_image","twitter_misc":{"Written by":"mikeyoung2018","Est. reading time":"10 minutes"},"schema":{"@context":"https:\/\/schema.org","@graph":[{"@type":"WebPage","@id":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/bonding-with-your-dog\/","url":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/bonding-with-your-dog\/","name":"Bonding With Your Dog - Are You Straining the Relationship?","isPartOf":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/#website"},"primaryImageOfPage":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/bonding-with-your-dog\/#primaryimage"},"image":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/bonding-with-your-dog\/#primaryimage"},"thumbnailUrl":"https:\/\/i0.wp.com\/s3-prod.dogtopia.com\/wp-content\/uploads\/sites\/189\/2018\/08\/IMG_5253.jpeg?fit=3024%2C4032&ssl=1","datePublished":"2018-08-14T16:14:07+00:00","dateModified":"2023-09-22T16:02:02+00:00","author":{"@id":"https:\/\/www.dogtopia.com\/edmond\/#\/schema\/person\/e7b2bc3b6c2e712bd01f17951b6ec878"},"description":"Of course your dog loves you! Wait, are you sure that you're not accidentally doing things that actually strain the bonding relationship? 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